Monday, September 21, 2009

Remembering what I already know

It seems that the more I learn about mindfulness, acceptance, the ego, etc. the harder it is for me to remember what I already know.  Today I found myself experiencing a lot of anxiety about several things that have happened in my life seemingly all at the same time (when it rains it pours).  I was only briefly immersed in my thoughts and worries before remembering that I am not my thoughts -- I am the one who observes my thoughts.  So I stepped back and observed all of my worries nonjudgmentally.  "See," I thought to myself.  "There's no reason to be anxious.  You can get rid of your anxiety."  THEN I remembered that the whole purpose of mindfulness is to experience your feelings, not to push them away.  (Oops).  So I allowed myself to feel anxious.  I guess I almost got ahead of myself -- I was so focused on moving beyond my ego that I forgot to simply be in the present moment. 

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