A while back I wrote in one of my posts about whether or not I should say "I love you" to the special person in my life. At the time I decided I shouldn't because it was obvious to me that the primary reason I wanted to tell him I loved him was because I wanted him to love me too. I've continued to think about it -- whether I should say it or keep it to myself, whether my feelings really constitute love or if they're more indicative of attachment.
I believe that I'm becoming less attached to him. When we're together I spend more time noticing things about him and paying attention to what he says, what he does, and who he is as opposed to focusing on how he makes me feel. I'm making a real effort to see and know him as a person.
Despite this, I don't think I'll ever stop wanting him to love me. I don't think I can say I love you and not feel hurt if he doesn't say it back. I would love to believe I have it within me to be that selfless -- to love without expecting anything in return -- but I don't know if I can do it.
I don't know so I just keep my feelings to myself, at least for now...
Thank you for continuing creativity and imagination photos of Jose Ramon welcome.
ReplyDeleteRegards
Wow... I just commented on your last post ~ now I get to comment again? YES!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm only going to say this once... ok, maybe more than once:
YOU HAVE HAVE HAVE TO TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM... IF YOU REALLY DO!!!!!
I wish I knew your first name, cause it's soo needed right now ;-) (maybe it's in your profile).
It's not about whether or not he says it back (outcome)...
It's about your love for him, period (no attachment to outcome).
Your personal journey is about being able to say this w/out the worry of the result. Process overrides result... always! If you feel the love, share the news!!!!
I'll only tell you this twice:
YOU HAVE HAVE HAVE TO TELL HIM!
Let me know whatcha think.
Dayne
Even though it a positive thing to address attachment in your life, there's also a place where you can become attached to trying to not be attached.
ReplyDeleteI think often we have to purify love by living it in the muddy, sticky unclarity of now.
There's no way too get through life without feeling hurt sometimes. Hurt, too, passes in time.
I'm guilty, myself, of holding back and deliberating too much. So, I'm in no position to tell you what to do.
However, if you or I or anyone is ever going live life fully, we have to embrace it all, including expressing ourselves completely, and letting the chips fall as they will.
Ditto! Yes. Yes. Yes. Express your love. It's who you are. It's not about what anyone else thinks of you. It's about your great heart, your magnanimous heart. Are you uncomfortable with the words? I think it's the activity of expressing the love in your heart that counts and that expression happens in many ways-- not just with words.
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